Wednesday, 23 July 2014

Categories of men who can't be in a relationship

1. Men who are looking for their mother
These men are looking to be fed,  having their cleaning done.
2. Men who are too absorbed in themselves
It's their life,  their hobbies,  their friends,  their ambitions,  their children, their....... Somehow their women doesn't seem to come into the equation.
3. Men who are too on a mission
The focus and dedication of a man on a mission is an amazing sight.  Sometimes,  it just goes too far.  Sometimes the climber climbs one too many mountains and kills the relationship in the process. Sometimes the businessman goes on one too many trips abroad and loses sight of home.  Men need to find a balance on this.
4. Men who see themselves as alpha
These are the ones that cause so much pain.  They are men who have a misplaced idea about men needing to be the alpha males. They chase and conquer women to show how great they are.  In the process that just show how lacking they are in any emotion,  understanding or even humanity. They are no better than dogs even if on the surface they appear to know what women want.
5. Men who just want a pal
These are the sad ones who spend their lives going to the pub or the football game.  They remember the great times with their pals when they were young and just want it to continue.
Occasionally it works when one of the women becomes one of the lads,  but this never lasts then the man is left wondering what happened.
Sometimes  men just need to realize they need to grow up.
6. Men who are afraid of intimacy
Men often have difficulty dealing with intimacy, particularly when a relationship appears to be out of their control.  These men also have difficulty acknowledging that they have difficulty dealing with intimacy.  They usually sublimate the emotions into actions that they can understand. This can show itself as aggression or even abuse,  but generally it just results in sullenness and withdrawal.
Men who have this difficulty need help to overcome their fear and learn to become a normal part of the world.
7. Men who want their lost youth
This shows itself classically in the mid life crisis.  Things were great when they were young or so they remember.  Life was free and easy,  there were no pressure,  no mortgages.  Their women were beautiful and nubile in the time before children..  They have affairs trying to reach their long lost Nirvana. In the process they throw everything away.  It is possible however to bring your youth into your present life by changing your outlook.
8. Men who want to control
These are men who can't love,  who just never seem to get over the temper tantrums of their childhood.  They want everything and they want it now.  No one is going to stand on their way. Nothing is good enough for them.
They need to open their eyes and see that there is a big wide world out there that doesn't revolve around them.
9. Men who lack a sense of polarity
These are new men who feel compassion  for their women and want to spend their lives honoring and worshipping them.  There's nothing wrong with this as such but the problem  comes when their masculinity disappears on the process.
They go into their feminine and lose their sense of being a man.  They seek equality with their woman and end up being the same.  The polarity disappears and the relationship becomes empty.
10. Men who are just too macho
They just get so tied up with being a man.  They look good,  they drive a great car and they just expect women to fall over themselves to get to them.  Well,  they do that at first.  Then they find that there's nothing there,  there's no substance,  no real man at all.  Don't get caught on this trap,  look at yourself long and slow and look for what a woman sees in you.
Men,  take care, become aware of who you are and how women see you. Don't become one of the men who can't love a woman,  be strong, be present and find love.

Material was from


  1. Hmmm! My sub used to be 9. :)

    Hopefully I'll work on it.


  2. Very good write up. I bet every man exhibits one or more of these traits. Its up to him to draw a line n make sacrifices to b a rel man to his partner.

    I have intimacy issues. Am commitment-phobic. I really need to work on me so I can enjoy a rel in future.

    Happy day to all BVs.

    1. Admitting you have a problem is the first step towards solving it. I wish you the best Kehinde.

  3. Oh mami....Tibs don't like Macho men....**whispering** where them lyrics at??...okay back to this...actually mami...I know you can't change a man - buh most of the categories mentioned above eh have got a lil flexibility....I tell you why lah...see...#1 needs a bitchslap to fix him......#3 needs a tap to remind him that he could go away for as long as he wants buh there is no guarantee he could come back and meet what he left behind.....#8 is a man who needs a that guy a dog and he will be fine.......hehe....hello mami..

    1. My day was very busy yesterday I didn't even remember I've not posted the lyrics.

  4. I despise men in the #9 category, they think every woman has the right to fall head over heels in love with them, the annoying thing is most times the only achievement they can pinpoint is 'the handsome face' like seriously. I don't know how ladies keep up with that bs.
    #8. I can't