Friday, 22 August 2014

NYSC DIARY (PART TWO)

*walks in* *picks register and mic*
Tibs?
Duru?
Moby?
Bobby?
Obiamaka?
Petite?
Mannie?
Chidinma?
Funmi?
Lily?
Shy Anon?
Temmy?
All the readers who won't drop comments?
Kehinde?
Dindu?
Godwin?
Eve?
Jay?
Uh,  who am I leaving out??

Am super excited putting this down. You see,  my days of living a regimented life is gradually coming to an end and now am seeing the truth in the saying "you don't know the value of what you have until you lose it"
Let me use this medium to wish Moby a belated birthday. You know our agreement oh *bats eyelashes*
A lot has been going on in this camp, really funny stuffs oh. Some days back we woke up to the news that the girls in the other hostel stole 4 phones in the dead of the night and that was the topic of the day only for the soldiers to wake us up around 1am the following midnight to match us all to that hotel. Mhen I was scared oh,  many of us tied towels there self. We were asked to sit on the floor  at that point I became apprehensive but the soldiers just talked to us and that was it.
Initially, I was very careful as I've heard stories of theft and the likes in NYSC camp but really even my water wasn't stolen in my hostel oh. That's surprising really but now that the girls in the other blocks are showing their talents,  am alert after all the child that says his mother won't sleep will not sleep too.
As usual in the orientation camp,  many ladies have been flirting with soldiers and I ask myself why girls choose to be stupid,  I mean camp holds thrice a year which means these guys get to sample different shapes and sizes of girls year round yet some girls would go and spread their legs!!!!  Really those soldiers that approached me directly or indirectly got a taste of my caustic tongue.  I just pity their poor wives at home.
Another trend I noticed is that some married women removed their wedding bands so they'll be able to flirt freely and am asking myself what manner of women these are.
Mhen,  I've seen different kinds of people from different backgrounds oh.  One on my hostel will tell you it's her veejay and I just shake my head when I go out at night because the things I see,  I just can't deal.
By now we know certificates are awarded in learning and character but the set of graduates I see on camp ehn! Imagine a graduate that cannot spell daughter,  a graduate that was asked his relationship with his next of kin and he wrote "married", graduates that cannot speak English,  some cannot write at all, some don't know the difference between he and she.. Even some of the OBS crew speak rubbish that now am regretting why I didn't join OBS.
How about my platoon? Am in platoon 8 and really it's full of useless people. Everybody wants to be the boss and we know there can't be two captains on one ship but my platoon peeps don't know that oh. Well by this time next week, I'll have become an ex platoon 8 member.
Lovelies I didn't want to type this but I owe you this because y'all have been checking up on me. The calls,  text messages etc. Okay,  I was really sick 5 days into my stay here and I had to be injected along side the drugs I was given but now am verrrrrrrrrrryyyyy fine,  am very fit as fiddle and I partook I'm all the man o war drilling (check my Facebook page and instagram for some of my pictures).
Really I've been enjoying myself on camp,  and no,  I've not fallen in love yet oh *bats eyelashes * but err *runs away*

39 comments:

  1. **sitay dance** Woohoo!!!!....My lovely mamacita came around!!!!!!....Yeah!! ...Oh mami....**sad face** It's been sooooo weird without you...I mean...we got alot to catch up on....first...Duru and I broke up buh thanks to the #buytibsaprivatejet campaign my husband started...We are back, better and stronger than ever..right Duru??.......and Moby now 'takes a bow' everywhere she goes....**eyeing Obiamaka** Obiamaka said Moby and I should stop taking Coke (in my head)....**pointing at Mannie** He now works from NASA.....everywhere he goes...it is all Space..........**sighs** I will give you the rest of them gist later.....hehe......Yay!!!...I am sooooo happy you posted something today.....okay soooooo married women are taking off their wedding bands so that they can flirt??....**dies**...that is one helluva arena of decepticons....Mehn...I am just happy that atleast you are okay and you have managed to find a way to make this a lil fun for you......buh really that guy who wrote his relationship with next of kin as 'married'.....like seriously??....mehn....Oh well....you are gonna be back soon and that's great.....soooooooo....the love part....you gonna tell us or do we need to employ the services of Fikemi??....(since she is a CIA liaison).........sorry this is long....I am just so excited...hehe....take care mami......**takes a bow like Moby**

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    1. hehehehehehehheheeh Tibs oh! hahahah You will not keee me with laugh shaaa...

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    2. My oh my I have a lot to catch up on. I've missed you babes . Hiya doing ?

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  2. Whoop! She's back! Mehn I can't wait to experience camp life, good to know you are enjoying it after all.

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  3. Regardless of whatever sh** that goes down in camp, its always fun. I'm sure d fire night will be superduper fun. Just enjoy ur stay and come back asap.












    #SHB

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    1. Man camp fire night was rubbish!! Total bullshit!!

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  4. Nice to know you are good Amaka! Nysc Camp seems so shitty when you are there, then you kinda miss it a little when you leave.
    Eeeeeeeew at those dirty Soldiers. I can't imagine sleeping with any of them lailai.
    I hope you get posted to a great place.Have fun dear.

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    1. LOol people can be adventurous in a stupid way though.. Yeah yeah I was posted to town.

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  5. Lol I'm now none commenters ba? Well its ok I'm glad to know you're doing absolutely fine over there. May God grace be upon you.

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    1. UUh papi I didn't tag you that though *bats eyelashes * thanks

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  6. lol at not fallen in Love>>>>>Glad your having fun and okay.
    Stay Happy and safe

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  7. Present Ma'am!
    For Amaka, NYSC means Now Your Success Continues.
    So pls come back n tell uduak how U fell in love** na Me go be mc on the wedding day**
    I am not surprised @ all those shits happening over there, NYSC camp na one kind place sha.
    Thank God You're well now.
    We miss You dear, mbok try o.






    Jay_Ricki

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  8. girl ,you just got me laughing all d way. Camp is always crazy ,believe me,i have been there.
    But glad u are enjoying yourself. about falling in love in camp...hmmm...that didnt happen to me .lol

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    1. Hello amaka, how is your day going? I have serious problem commenting on your blog. I check ur blog evry day but I cant comment just trying my luck now. Am glad u didnt fall in love with camp bois most of dem have serious gf at hm. Anywaiz be good

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    2. Shy anonymous*

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    3. Hehehe I steered clear of love on camp. Sweetie maybe it's network . Keep trying.

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  9. Hello Amaka darling - I have missed you so much

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  10. Present ma.....lol.was in platoon 8 too. Seyon dear,plenty tinz happen in camp.some make u laugh,grin,sigh,angry or shout WTF.glad u r having fun.never conform to the norms.be you anytime,anyday and any where

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    Replies
    1. My oga at the top!!! I made sure to do all of that.

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  11. Present Ma. Welcome back. So nice to have you back.

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    1. It feels good to be blogging again too.

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  12. Good to know you're having fun.
    Already an explatoon 8 member?

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  13. My dear the things I saw in camp enh!!

    A married woman was caught in the act!!, and she had disguised all the while without her wedding band...a man o war guy attempted to rape a girl and was decamped 'sharparly'...another man o war guy stole a 95k phone from the hostel, not knowing that someone was watching him...
    And about the mopol men? LOL, those ones fall in love with every lady in their platoon...
    There wasn't really much theft in my hostel, atleast none of my stuff got missing..

    About the falling in love stuff? haaa...guys with serious relationships outside camp will tell you all manner of sweet nonsense and expect you to fall...hahaha, camp was crazy...

    Welcome back dear

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    1. Camp was crazy babes!! Am glad am out.

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  15. I am glad you enjoyed your stay in camp. Girls and these army men sef ehen. I tire for the married women, i don't get why dey remove their rings. You would have waited for NYSC to finish before you got married na.

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