Tuesday, 20 January 2015

Forced friendship.

Hello everybody,  hope you're doing fine?  I want to make you happy.. Hope you're feeling..... Feeling feeling.. . . Hope you're feeling fine?

Hehehe don't mind me ooh!  Those of us that went to Nursery and primary school in Nigeria will remember this rhyme abi? If you didn't sing it then you went to jelosimi. End of story.

Back to the business for the day; this topic has been on my mind for a long time but I've not been able to get myself together to type something but this morning I've decided to share my thoughts with y'all.


By nature,  I'm very outgoing,  I mean you I start talking to people I just met,  you'll think I've known them for ages,  I'm hot tempered too,  I also have zero tolerance for rubbish but on the flipside  I could be very gentle and quiet if I want to be that those who don't know me always mistake me to be a quiet person *yimu*

I like making friends or should I say acquaintances because for me to call you my friend,  hmmmm,  he hard oh.
So when I was in school,  I had my friends I was loyal to and since we we were in different departments,  we rarely had time  to hang out and catch up on times and happenings so I was a one man squad in my department. There was this particular girl that would always walk up to me during lab hours and start little talks and I can talk to you for a year without talking about myself because I don't talk freely if I'm not free with you and since I liked to sit at the back,  she'll leave her front seat and come to the back to meet me.  On and on it went and this girl was cantankerous so nobody liked her,  I was indifferent sha but this girl was hell bent on being my friend oh!  After a while she said she wanted to visit me and all my effort to discourage her proved abortive. In fact she moved in with me for two months and funny enough we never fought!
All along I was scheming on how to discharge her because she loved me and I didn't have the smallest atom of likeness for her oh. When I saw the girl refused to understand my body language (I won't call her for months, yet she won't get angry)  I decided to let her be since I knew after graduation,  I won't be seeing her like that. After graduation, I cut her but ,she pings me and all but she is getting the message now I believe.

Just when I was happy I was free,  I met another girl bent on being my "bestie"  in my lodge. I just don't like this girl one bit,  funny enough when she starts her bullshit I ignore her,  this girl has fought with everyone here except me.

One time I just woke up and decided not to talk to her and she started sending me messages on WhatsApp that she loves me but I hate her,  blah blah blah and I just decided to let her be. This babe is always eager to please me. I'll be sleeping and before I wake up,  she has cooked and put it beside my bed *sigh* in fact everyone has been asking what I did to her but they don't understand that she's far from people I can call my friend!
Since I decided to cut her off this year,  I was just waiting for the perfect moment  because I like in fact love to give people the benefit of doubt and everything we share in common,  I got mine except the storage unit for water. When she started her madness last week,  I knew the time had come so I just calmly told her from that day,  she should paddle her canoe and tell you what,  she was shocked but I didn't care anyways.
I feel so happy knowing that I don't have to deal with someone forcing herself on me jare.

That's it my dearies oh,  I know I'm not the only one who has experienced this.  Share yours with us too!

18 comments:

  1. Okay first of 'cantankerous'??....I really need to own a dictionary mehnnnn....Howdy mami....So I understand the sometimes we have NOTHING in common with people and hence, it is difficult to relate to them on a friendship note....(I got that too)...buh you know, we don't see what people see in us...sometimes Yes! we KNOW who we are buh you gotta understand that we can not entirely/exactly see ourselves through the eyes of others...so what do we do when faced with someone hell bent on being your friend when you can't see a common ground with them?....We let them in and try to figure out more bout ourselves through their eyes...no harm done mami......although, sometimes, our instincts can be right bout them or the fact that we don't dig them.....buh still, no harm done in letting them in......Love mi big sis!

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    1. Cantankerous Ghen ghen!!.. You see why Amaka rocks?! She knows how to teach us new stuff.. Cantankerous is going into my DIary ASAP! lmao... So by force frendship ba? well I dont think thats good for either the "friender" or the "friendee" In my confused head yeah, I think nothing in life is by force, so we have to somehow find where we are accepted and stick to it.. I mean Bubba, forcing us on another will only bring hurt, so why do it.. Mehn I cant deal ooo, by force friendship is wrong on all levels. :)

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    2. Ernie but when you let them in and all they give you is trouble nko? This girl gossips about me, you know she's the one that said I was having sex in a car, yet I turned a deaf ear to all the gossips but she won't let me be. This girl is also jealous of me so I figured that since she's not adding value to my life, instead she's giving me headache there's no point.
      Love you too honey

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    3. Duru you're not serious oh *side eye*

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  2. I'm wondering tho, is it that these people are bad people or your spirit doesn't just sync with theirs? Me I tolerate and make room for anybody who wants to enter. However, my intuition is bad ass as in, once I feel some kinda bad vibe about someone it never is wrong. Maybe that's why I've never really had 'friend' drama.

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    1. Lohla they are bad. See ba, I can cope with almost anybody so when I start complaining, then the handshake is going beyond the wrist.
      These people only radiate negative vibes

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  3. As in ehn, there are justsome people we just don’t get on with. Not because they are necessarily toxic or bad people, but because our interests and personalities simply aren’t compatible. Sakey mi, Feel free to make your own decisions without any pressure, and that includes cutting away from meaningless association jawe. We don't need "serenre" in our circle. lol. Most times tho, I choose my own friends.

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    1. I've always chosen my friends but these people creep in somehow.
      It's been ages oh

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  4. I'm quite open. So I give chances to those who wanna be friends with me. But like the Unix os; I'm not user-friendly.





























    #Mannie

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  5. I would really not like to comment after reading this... except I'm doing that already. #OkBye

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  6. Unfortunately, I do not remember that rhyme - I probably wasn't paying full attention in Kindergarten. Experience has taught me that there are two things that cannot be forced, and they are true friendship and true love. You do not fight for them neither are they earned - they just hapoened. trying too hard has been proven to be abortive because it always does the opposite of what you want it to do, fact!


    Mana that girl bukwa a real pest oooooo

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    1. Hehehe.. Maybe it wasn't common in the East.
      Well said dear, you don't force friendship or love.

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  7. Friendship is by choice,not by force.

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  8. Oh no....I think I'M "that person" who forces you to be their friend. Sad part is everyone ends up loving me and saying they are so glad they got to know me because I'm funny and fun to be around. I JUST WANT EVERYONE TO THINK I'M AMAZING FROM OFF THE BAT! Is that too much to ask?!

    Confessions of a once-in-awhile drama queen.

    Xoxo,

    La Deutsche Diva
    http://ladeutschediva.blogspot.com

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    1. If you're funny and amazing, honey I don't mind the forced friendship but these girls up there?? God have mercy.

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