Monday, 17 August 2015

Online relationships

Have you ever developed strong feelings for a guy/girl but you’ve never met him/her? Never talked to him/her on the phone? Never skyped with him/her?


Today we’ll be looking at online relationships. Materials / content are from the internet.
Wikipedia  defines an online relationship as an interpersonal relationship between people who have met online and in many cases know each other only via the internet. This relationship can be romantic, platonic or even based on business affairs.
People no longer need to search on the street to find casual relationship, they can find them online.

An online relationship is tricky as it provides the opportunity for misrepresentation particularly in the early stages of a relationship when commitment is low and self representation and enhancement agenda are high but it isn’t impossible.

By communicating regularly, being honest and making time to really get to know each other, an online relationship can grow.

When going into an online relationship, make sure to do the following.

- Make sure the site is legitimate
- Check the site’s privacy setting
- Protect your identity. Do not give your cell phone number till you feel completely comfortable
- Stay anonymous until you feel safe
- Trust your guts
- Never send money
- Avoid getting too personal too early
- Report threats to law enforcement
- Do set aside time each day to talk on the phone, email, skype or chat online with your partner and make sure it’s a time when you both will not be interrupted
- Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not just so the other person will like you more
- Do remember important dates in your new partner’s life, send ecards on birthdays and remember to congratulate them on important events like job promotion, football team’s win, etc

With time, relationships get boring, whether real or virtual, to stop an online relationship from being boring,
- Include each other in your day to day lives and activities as much as possible
- Make the conversation personal
- Be spontaneous and creative
- Be cautious
- Discuss the future

Warning signs
- Extravagant stories: eg I'm a model, a flight attendant and in medical school. Like seriously? Only you,  three things at a time?

- Will never video chat: what are they afraid of?

- No updated pictures: same profile picture for a long time without changing it. Common! Is your face that bad?

- Limited number of pictures: you don’t have to beg before he/she sends pictures. Have you been dating and you’ve got just three pictures of your partner? That’s not good enough.
Ok lemme tell y'all about Wale and I. We met on Twitter, he requested I added him on bbm and I did. For a long time I forgot he was on my bbm till towards late last year and we got talking. He said he likes me blah blah blah, BUT he never used his picture as dp. I didn't even mind until I asked and he told me that when we see,  I'll know what looks like. Seriously??  Ok stopped disturbing him but he started disturbing me to come and see him from Sokoto, I told him after nysc when I'm back to the west, we'll see.
After nysc, he was on my neck to come and I told him to send his picture too (not like I was going to go anyway) and he was like who have I been talking to that I started asking suddenly (so because I kept mute, I have no mind of my own?) anyway after much going back and forth, he said he'll send it and I made up my mind I won't ask,  after like 2 weeks he sent it. Really?? After close to a year,  I have to beg to see your picture? Mtschew. I knew that was a red flag and told him nothing can work out between us.

- No phone calls: this is one of the red warning signs in a relationship, virtual or real. Why would my partner not want to hear my voice? Heaven knows I don’t hesitate to call it quits once we start to have call issues.

- Provide limited information: we are dating for deuces sake! I should know some vital things about you.

- No key information; if you’re in a relationship and your partner is not giving up the goods on what fly really feels like, then it really isn’t a relationship.

- Inconsistent stories: little inconsistencies can add up to lies!

Have you ever been in an online relationship or catfished in one?

11 comments:

  1. An Online relationship is a no-no, for me tho!
    Nma's Blog 

    ReplyDelete
  2. Very few have been lucky with it sha but one must be veryyyy careful

    Scammers everywhere!!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Replies
    1. Yes oh especially online stuffs to avoid stories that touch.

      Delete
  4. i cant say online dating doesnt exist. it has worked out for some.some people have built a strong relationship through online dating.
    i will just advise that anyone going into it should be wiae

    ReplyDelete
  5. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  6. One needs to be very careful with online dating even though it has worked for some people. Great post dear
    www.alabekee.com

    ReplyDelete