Monday, 7 September 2015

Should a lady be close friends with her partner's friend and vice versa?

I was seeing a movie when I got the urge to blog about this.
Here is the summary of the story:  A guy and a lady were dating but due to circumstances, the young man was yet to get a job several years after graduation, the lady had a job though but she stuck with him. Then the guy's friend came back from overseas and since he couldn't cook, his friend's girl will cook and take over. From there, they started cultivating friendship or whatever to the extent she told him he  could always talk to her. Stop.
*swallows spit*
You see ehn,  sometimes, I'm so calm to the point of being labelled 'non challant' or lackadaisical according to my mum. I mean, while others are scheming to snoop and check their partner's phones and know who the side chick is,  I'd rather bother my head with how to compose the next message I'll send to him but while I don't bother my pretty head over somethings, I'd not take it likely if my man is a very good friend of/to my best friend, ah, I can't take it.
I mean,  why would they spend time together talking about issues when he's supposed to be my best friend or even talk to his own best friend?? Now, I'm not saying don't be friends with my own friends but spending time, hanging out and co is not allowed, call me paranoid, I gree.
I'm an advocate for being friends before being partners because really, when the chips are down,  I love you won't suffice and for the Thomases that think you can't be best friends with your partner, trust me, it's real!
So after a while, this lady started being jealous if the dude hangs out with another girl oh, now, what do we call that?? You see ehn, sometimes, nobody sets out to stray but the way we behave invariably amounts to shooting ourselves in the leg... I'm sure you can guess what the end result was.
Now, what's your take on your partner being good friends with your best friend??

PS 1. While I said I won't monetize the blog,  I got an offer last month, but on the condition I make my blog less personal. I said I'll think about it and I'm done thinking.
This blog was supposed to be a political blog but after the first post, my elder brother sat me down and asked me if I really wanted to tow that path, I thought deeply and changed the course and I won't change it again. I blog as the spirit leads and if that will lead to my not getting adverts, fine. I have a 7-4 job that though it's not the ghen ghen one I spent 5 years in school for,  I'm okay so thanks.
2. When I said I was depressed, I'm sure many of you thought about men issues or something,  well, in a way, yes it is that and I've been thinking if I should hold on about the post till I get the break but now I'm convinced I want to blog abut it now,  I'll follow my spirit and blog about it the day it enters my head, but no,  I'm not heartbroken. Lol
3. It's three months I started one venture and I've been holding every 7th dear to my heart. I shall spill I'm due course, just keep your fingers crossed *winking at Gloria*.
4. My blog will be a year older soon and I'm not rich like rich to do what I really want to do to appreciate you, you and you but erm, as I'm typing this,  what came to my mind is taking one person to the movies *thinking*  I might change my mind tomorrow oh...... Oya let me stop now. Mwah!!


  1. If I hear that my boo is best friends to another woman.. I mean!!! What am I now here for. For me its a no no abeg, what's that???. In fact the thought of it is vexing me sef..

    Please share your story with us oh, wil be glad to read..


    1. Lool oya come *hugs* don't vex you hear? *puppy face*

  2. ok... first of all. my man and i are meant to be besties,,, he can have someone close o.. buh not closer that he won't wanna share deep stuff me... secondly. thank God ur heart is safe and we are ready to read when u re ready to spill


  3. It all depends o... but one sure thing is if as a guy I get to spend more time with my partners girl friend, it means that I am calling for trouble, because on the long run, two things are involved: either she begins to irritate me or I get to start liking her beyond even my own imagination (and the connection grows). If I still love my girl, I will watch how close I get to her friends... Seriously!

    1. You shouldn't even get close!! End of discussion

  4. Abeg don't like being best friends with my partner's friends and vice versa. One of my hubby's friend was trying so hard to be my friend (still don't know why) but my actions passed a louder message lol..
    So why winking at me? Anybody that winks at me takes me to a move oo (See hustling....
    Dear wish you all the best in your blog, your career and personal life..

    1. Thanks dearie.
      We can work something out you know

  5. Friends bawo. Abeggy it's not allowed biko. With all the fake people around. I don't want to hear stories that touch.
    I am my partner best friend and he is also my BFF

  6. I still think you should monetise the blog Amaka