Monday, 30 November 2015


Hello, how are you doing *in psquare's voice* how did our weekend, the turning up and turning down go?? I bet we all are ready to face the new week?? May God crown all our effort this week. Amin 
So today, we'll be looking at the concept of respect. 
Africans are a respectful lot. The part of Africa where I am from (western Nigeria), we respect elders so much that part of our greeting involves lying flat on the ground by the male folk and kneeling down on both knees by the female folk. That is just one part of the many set of respect ‘rules and regulations’ we have to abide by.


I think the fact that I am a product of two tribes is part of why I call my elder brother by his name. I remember one weekend my paternal first cousins came over, we had to call them ‘aunty’ and ‘uncle’, then when they left, my dad started to enforce a new rule! He said I had to affix ‘brother’ to Iyke and my kid brother had to affix ‘sister’ to Seyon. Man, all hell was let loose!!! I was like is it at 7 years old that I was going to learn something strange? In fact it felt awkward to the ears when I called my elder brother ‘brother Iyke’ and I had to beg my dad to excuse my kid brother from attaching ‘sister’ to my name. Well, my kid brother still calls my elder brother ‘brother Iyke’ and recently, when he calls me "sister mi", it takes seconds to process the fact that he's referring to me but as for me and my coconut head, I don’t see myself calling my elder brother ‘brother’. End of story.


Another supposed sign of respect is genuflecting when greeting an elder. Man, I tell you the culture difference did not help because in my mum’s place (eastern Nigeria), you  don’t go all the way to the floor but in my dad’s place, we have to go down south (no pun intended). I remember I used to have difficulties kneeling down and one of my aunt was like my mum did not train us well (in Yoruba land, when a kid is spoilt (real or assumed), he/she is the child of the mother, but if a child is well trained, he is the father’s child) and I was mad!! I had to bite my tongue to keep it in check but trust me, when I got home, I told my mother and she told me to start to kneel down *grumbling* well, funny enough when I see an elder even on the road now, I go all the way (my dark knees can bear me witness).


In Nigeria, I know looking at an elder in the eyes while you are being talked to is termed ‘disrespectful’ (I stand corrected).
I remember being labelled what my parents did not name me because I looked an elder in the eye.


Aha! This is the part I love because my mum and I had epic fights over this. You see, my mouth is very sharp and quick *bats eyelashes* and I hate injustice (real or perceived). I do not hesitate to speak up when I am offended because I hate to keep things on my mind (it kills me slowly). Now, it is natural for elders to offend young people but I do not know if it is pride that prevents African parents from admitting they are wrong even when they are pointed out.


I remember I spoke only English for the first 17 years of my life. When I got into university in western Nigeria, it dawned on me I had to learn Yoruba. Imagine the look of horror on my landlord’s face when I used ‘oh’ to address him. It was a kind housemate that patiently explained to me that ‘oh’ is for young people while ‘eh’ is for adults.

Now, these are just the few everyday instances I can remember and I am sure we are not strangers to these examples.

I am of the opinion that respect is earned. Yes! You earn respect; you do not force people to respect you!!!! Yeah, the Bible states that we should honour our father and mother so that our days on earth may be long as that is the first commandment with promise and I am sure we all know ‘parents’ refer to people older than us, not just our biological parents but with no intent to disrespect anyone, I’ve seen some ‘parents’ that firstly are not worthy to be parents; I call them ‘chance parents’ as they had parenthood foisted on them by mistake and they probably realized too late they were not cut out to be parents.

These set of people treat kids they sired with disdain. I see no reason why I should respect someone who only doles out torrents of curses morning, noon and night, someone who clearly abdicates his/her parental responsibilities, I mean you too judge!

On the issue of calling elders ones aunty, sister, brother or uncle, well I do not have anything against it but NOTE that you do not learn how to use your left hand in your old age.

As per the greeting, experience has taught me that salutation is not love, neither is it respect, so the fact that I kneel down to greet you do not mean I respect you. Kapish?

From my little exposure, maintaining eye contact means that you are confident and bold. Please, some aspect of our culture should be revised if we are expected to adapt to whatever culture we find ourselves outside of our comfort zone. Besides, we know when you are on an interview panel, you are expected to maintain eye contact with the interviewer.

You see that aspect of parents? Remember the same Bible says that parents should not provoke their children to anger.

Your take?

PS. This was first blogged on the 14th of October, 2014 by yours truly. 

Saturday, 28 November 2015

Grammar 101

How are y'all doing?? I'm sorry I'm bringing this late, as I'm  typing this now self my eyes are tinted as I've been out all day but I met a fan today *pops collar* and I promised I was going to blog whenever I get home. Shout out to all the anonymous in the house that read and don't comment.

Remember, we are still looking at cognates.

  1. No and know: No means the opposite of yes. To know is to understand or realise. 
  2. Noisome and noisy: Noisome means disgusting, offensive and potentially harmful while noisy means a lot of sound. 
  3. Nonplussed: it is often misused in the sense of calm and unbothered. The actual meaning is confused or bewildered. 
  4. Obeisance and obsequious: Obeisance is respect and homage paid to someone while obsequiousness is submissiveness and an eagerness to obey. 
  5. Obtuse and abstruse: Obtuse means lacking quickness or wit or sensitivity, dull, dense.  Abstruse means too difficult to understand for the average mind. 
  6. Overdo and overdue: Overdo is to exaggerate something, overdue indicates something that has missed it's deadline. 
....... And that's it dovies. 

Thursday, 26 November 2015

The nastiest!!

Hiya, hiya, so I'm typing this excitedly.. No, I'm not excited about the topic whatsoever, I'm excited and for no just reason.. I think something is about to happen.
So tell me, how has the week been so far?? Well, it didn't start on a smooth note for me but I've blended sha, as a street bred..

I was thinking about how to get my lazy ass to type the next post when I got an idea... It won't be bad to talk about the nastiest thing said to you or about you.
After juggling my memory, I can't really remember what nasty things said to me but I clearly remember some said about me.

  1. Recently, someone wrote on some blog that I,  Ndidiamaka Hundeyin has a lesbian history. My first reaction was rage, shock, anger and amusement. I had to check if it wasn't April 1st because in fact, it is more amusing than nasty when I think about it but hey, I'm open to receiving insults and whats not, but calling me a lesbian, oh well. 
  2. This is quite lengthy but I'll make it brief. It started during my predegree days, these two were dating, babe was my housemate and I knew her real boyfriend but I acted blind though... So many waters passed under the bridge and when we got admission, she wasn't financially stable so I took her in, unfortunately, the predegree boyfi was our neighbour and I noticed they weren't on talking terms.. Somehow dude and I got so close and he told me how she used him and dumped him. As the sharp mouth I am,  I asked her as per roomie but she said they never dated. Oh well
Somehow we got extremely close (she had moved out by now) and she started giving me attitude because dude and I were close. Dude is a very fine guy so before I  could say Jack, she started peddling rubbish on campus that I snatched her boyfi. I was like she you denied dating him, why is it paining you that we are close?? We started doing things in common, I started forming like we were dating and I added PDA self, before long, all her friends started pointing fingers at me. In UNAAB that year, I was know as the boyfriend snatcher oh, I was popular in a not so popular way. Outside I was putting up boldface but in my room, I couldn't imagine how someone I took as my sister and even housed and fed could sly me. It was even painful when I remember she was just using the dude for monetary reasons. The story is long! Anyway at some point, I just assumed she and her friends never existed and 2 years later, all of them came to beg me but I told them to go and apologise to all the people they gossiped to me about. It took a lot for me to get over it but it made the dude and I pals for life but I cringe each time I remember how I was called "boyfriend snatcher" in school and around where I lived. 

So let's talk... What is the nastiest thing ever said about you?? 

Wednesday, 25 November 2015

Ramblings from my heart

I'm sorry but I'll be skipping the niceties and greetings. I just want to pour my heart out and please, when you are done reading, I don't need any pityparty I'm so sorry blah blah blah. I'll fix myself, all I  need is to write and when I'm done, I just might feel better.
Sometimes, I wish I were blogging anonymously, I mean,  I have a lot I want to talk about especially about sex. All the George and Georginas that read my blog and come to attack me on bbm esp when I blog about sex, don't mess with me on this post. Back to my rambling, I love sex, yes I do but I can't write about it freely because of family blah blah blah reading the blog.
Wait, do I even know what family really means?? I've never had it normal for more than say 10 hours at most before we go back to walking on eggshell to prevent any brouhaha. I remember the way I cried when she said she was quitting finally but somehow I was happy if it was going to give everybody closure maybe and peace. I wonder why he cheated, I mean, damn him. I'm not bold enough to write about it, I thought I was over it but I cry each time I remember because I can't point to the reason. This is one reason I wish I was anonymous. My heart is  filled and no, I don't want to talk to anybody I know, neither do I want to talk to any female, I think I prefer the male, especially, someone I've not met and might never meet.
Lately, I've been fighting depression and I was almost becoming a drug addict but after overcoming my alcohol addiction, I told myself drug isn't the next thing and I've stopped taking any prescription pills.
Love? This is for another day but cupid, is it too much if I stay happy without worries?? I drown myself  with work so I don't moan my "plight" but I think I'm also damaged from what I grew up with.

On a lighter note, let's talk about anything.. Something cheerful. Remember, no "oh, I'm sorry".  Maybe we should talk about sex and religion. I watched a video on IG where the pastor said the only normal position is missionary style and any other plus oral is demonic..
Please  no holier than thou on my post. Ike okwu adiro. Ehen.
Off to work!! 

Tuesday, 24 November 2015

Hello, I'm Yoruba!!

Hiya lovies and dovies.. How is the week coming up?? Mine has been smooth so far, save for the terrible heat in Lagos.

So before I start, let me apologise to my Yoruba folks, please don't vexz with me ehn, as regards the title. Hope I've been forgiven in advance?? Kisses.

When I was much younger, I hated house chores, but I loved the broom. Not the tush broom oh,  I'm talking about the igbale made from palm frond. You know why I loved it??  If my brothers offended me,  I'll use it to whip them because it leaves marks on the body. One day,  my kid bro told me never to use it on him and when I asked,  he said his kokoro will reduce if I touch him with broom. Ha!!
I sha still used it on him and I'm sure his kokoro didn't reduce neither is it non functional.

What prompted this post?? I was walking the other day when two boys were playing and one took a broom to hit the other and the boy about to be hit said "I'm a Yoruba boy and you can't hit me with that". In my mind, I said what if it's used on an Ibo boy??

That is just one of the very many superstitious beliefs we were fed with as kids.
I remember my mum told me not to cross where bitterleaf water was poured as my peepee will pain me.
Another one that has been handed over the years is that if a male eats okra, it will reduce the thickness of their sperm. Plix any witness in the house??
I remember I grew tits as early as 9 and my friends used to put kuluso on theirs so it will come out,  I really can't remember if it worked or not.
Do you remember the rain is falling, sun is shining, lion is giving birth myth too?? Or the devil has eaten it story if your biscuit falls on the ground??
Let's discuss. 

Monday, 23 November 2015

Say what??

I've been following events in Nigeria closely since this new administration took over. TBH, I don't support both APC and PDP as the politicians only cross to where the grass is greener but that's not the crux of the matter today.

During the week, I read an excerpt where the 36 state governors said they can no longer pay the 18,000 minimum wage. Really?? They gave a flimsy excuse that that amount was forced on them by the former president. 

I cover my face in shame when old men make such ridiculous statement. Haba!! In sane climes, they'll slash the numerous allowances they get but only in Nigeria do we do things upside down. 

I can't even imagine how far the 18,000 will go for a low cadre staff who has children in the university. Why are politicians in Nigeria wicked?? 

See the lawmakers fighting over juicy committes, I mean, by their statements, you will know their intent. I can't believe this is the change people were fighting for that they almost beat me up when I was the presiding officer and they said APC must win. 

I'm with organised labour on grinding the country to a halt if such idea they are nursing sees the light of the day. Meanwhile, we are waiting for the petroleum minister to address us on why fuel is scarce or is it PDP that is hoarding fuel this time??

Have a blessed Monday and enjoy the rest of your week. 

Sunday, 22 November 2015


Yesterday, the youth wing of my church went on a trip to the city of brown roofs (Ibadan) and we visited the UI Zoological gardens and Agodi gardens. 

We ran into the usual Lagos Ibadan expressway traffic and got to UI around 12 noon. When we made to pay, a mild drama occurred. 

The notice read 500 naira per head and 300 per group but the lady on duty said because we are from Diocese of Lagos West (she read it from our bus), we were going to pay 500 naira per head. That's where the drama started oh. We snapped the notice and said we'll circulate it on all social media. I don't know if the lady thought she was addressing illiterates because when the shouting match started  instead of her to be sorry, she said we were rude. Ha! Awa omo Oshodi wey get scuches, it wasn't a small thing but we dragged it, at that point, I already lost interest in the place self but after all said and done, we paid the 300 naira while the lady tore the notice away. 
So I'm wondering, we say corruption has ravaged the land, we say our leaders are corrupt, how about we that try to swindle people of their hard earned money??  Few months ago, I was travelling from Warri to Lagos, after I paid my fare, the ticket lady said there was no change. I stood my ground, she wanted to use waffi  sense, me Lagos babe, I tell her, sis, if you want money for card, tell me but no use sense for me. She just smiled and said aunty nawa for you oh. 
Those of us who aid corruption however little must stop. You take your child to write waec in a miracle centre, what is that? At the airport, you see them custom and immigration harassing travellers and we say we want our country to be good?? No way. 

Anyway, when we got to Agodi gardens, I finally overcame my phobia for water and went on a boat ride for the first time in my life. I didn't snap much pictures with my phone but I'll share one  selfie I took. 

All in all sha, I was glad I went on the trip. 


Hello good people of blogosphere
, how have you been?? I'm sorry I keep going AWOL, I know you're tired of my apologies but really, I won't stop. Work has been very tasking and hopefully, by next month, I'll get a break.

So straight up, for my non Hausa speaking dovies, nagode means thank you.

OK, what exactly is Amaka thanking us for now I can hear some of you asking, lol, I'm thanking you for being there for me and most importantly, I'm thankful to Mily and Sassy mum for nominating me for the SISTERHOOD OF THE WORLD BLOGGERS AWARD. In fact, eez not a small something *in Falz voice*; you see all these awards they are sharing, I print them and frame and hang in my room oh. Lol

I'm supposed to answer 10 questions and since I got nominated twice, I have 20 questions in all *wipes brow* but before I answer  I have to type the rules.

  1. Thank the blogger who nominated you, linking back to their site. Check ☑ 
  2. Put the award logo on your blog. Check ☑ 
  3. Answer the 10 questions sent to you. Check ☑ 
  4. Nominate 5 blogs. Check ☑ 
  5. Make up 10 new questions for your nominees to answer. Check ☑ 
So leggo. 

Let's start with Sassy's questions.

  1. Who is your favourite American male actor?  I'm not a film person oh. 
  2. Who is your favourite American female actress? Same as 1.
  3. Are you a book lover? If yes, what type of books do you love to read? Yes, yes and yes! I love all of Sheldon, Cussler, Karen Kingsbury, James Patterson and lately, Danielle Steel. 
  4. Do you like sassy mum's blog? If yes, why? Yes, I do. I love the homely feel there. 
  5. Do you like nollywood films? I'm not a movie fan, but sometimes I do watch. 
  6. Do you like to cook or are you a take out freak? I love whipping up dishes oh. 
  7. Are you single, married or in a relationship? I'm in a ship, lol. 
  8. What is your view about gays and transgenders? I have no words for them? 
  9. Do you believe sex before marriage is the best? If  yes, why? Well, I don't know. Biblically, it's wrong but we know most of us flout it. 
  10. Name 5 blogs you think are the best in Nigeria. I love Bella, SDK, and others. 
Now to Mily's. 

  1. Which one do you prefer, high heel shoes or flat shoes and your reason for your preference. I love both depending on my mood. I'm petite so I love that heels make me taller and flats for days I want to rest my calves. 
  2. If you are given a chance to change one thing in your life, what will it be?? This is emotional for me, but I'll do it anyway. It'll be that my parents got it right maritally.
  3. What are the characteristics you want in your man? I'm a sucker for intelligent dudes, his diction must be good, he must have a good sense of humour, God lover and should be able to tolerate me because my personality ranges from fiesty to paranoid. 
  4. Name your favourite verse in the Bible. Proverbs 30v8.
  5. What is your most embarrassing moment. The first day I got on an escalator in Silverbird galleria, VI. 
  6. What attitude disgusts you. People who can't control their appetite disgust me. 
  7. What do you think of Mily's blog. Cool blog you have there. 
  8. What is that possession of yours that you can't let go? Even if your best friend needs it badly? Honestly, nothing. 
  9. What do you think the government should do concerning these frequent sex crimes involving minors. Castrate them, cut their penis off, roast it, feed them with it and leave them to choke on it while bleeding to death. 
  10. Do you think couples in courtship should be having sex and why? Hian. I've answered it before nah. 
My nominees are 
  1. Your greatest strength. 
  2. Your view on the wind of change blowing in Nigeria? 
  3. No sex for one year or no phone for one year? 
  4. What do you think of me and my blog? 
  5. Your favourite hangout spot? 
  6. Are you living your dream? 
  7. If you could go back on a time machine, what would you change? 
  8. Dream holiday destination? 
  9. Blogger or WordPress? 
  10. What has blogging taught you? 

Saturday, 14 November 2015

Gratitude post

So I got nominated for the gratitude challenge by Favour and I'm so excited because once upon a time, we had 'em awards coming in like no man's business and suddenly, there was this dearth of awards...
It is a virtual thing, yeah, but I'm excited because it means someone finds my blog worthy to say the least and considering the fact that I've been taking series of French leave like no man's business, I'm honoured.

According to the organisers, I have 72 hours to accept the challenge upon nomination, I'm also to write or say 5 things I'm grateful for on ANY social media platform, display a picture of gratitude and finally nominate 5 other people in my circle which includes blogosphere.

Sometimes last month, I did a post on things I'm thankful for, that same week, I was devastated, the weeks to follow were even worse but in all, I'll praise him still. I have so much to be grateful for indeed.

1. I'm grateful for the gift of life; I'm typing unaided, I'm not breathing through oxygen mask, I'm not in Igbobi, it's not because I'm holy, righteous or faithful but I'm a product of grace. For this, I say thank you Father.

2. I'm grateful for the lives of my loved ones. I've cried over loses this year but the Bible says he won't tempt us more than our capacity can carry. It's not been easy but his grace has been sufficient for me.

3. I'm grateful for the friends God gave me. Sometimes, I really don't understand myself, I can range from being paranoid, to bipolar, to being a recluse and so on, but I still have the most amazing friends who stick their heads out for me.

4. I'm thankful for the prayer God answered concerning my kid brother. We've been on a particular issue for over 4 years and miraculously, God did it when we least expected. I'll go to press when he gives me the go ahead. Lol.

5. Finally, I'm grateful to God for the successful completion of my national service. I served in Sokoto, on the fringes of the Sahara. I experienced extremities of weather, all the times I travelled, there was no bad news and I came back home in one piece upon completion of service.

In my Father's house 
.... And my nominees are

  1. Tito
  2. Nma
  3. Chinco
  4. Diva
  5. Gloria

Grammar 101

Hello all, I know I'm uber late but it's better late than never yeah??

1. Mantel and Mantle. 
A mantel is the shelf above a fireplace while a mantle is a cloak or a blanket. 

2. Marshal and Marshall. 
A marshal is an officer of the highest ranking or it can mean to arrange, while marshall is a verb meaning "together". 

3. May be and Maybe. 
May be as two words mean "might be" while maybe is one word that means "perhaps". 

4. Meet, Mete and Meat. 
Meet means "to get together" or connect with someone, to encounter, mete means "to distribute" and meat is flesh that may be eaten. 

5. Militate and Mitigate. 
Militate means "to influence towards or against a change" while mitigate means to lessen, make easier or bearable. 

6. Mute and moot. 
Mute means having no sound or without speech, moot as a noun is a public debate, as an adjective means open to debate in the UK and not open to debate in the US. 

Thursday, 12 November 2015


Good morning great young minds.. Without much ado.. Please let me introduce you to the Future.. Let me introduce you to #BLUE.
B.L.U.E: acronym for Born leaders Under Enlightenment, is a coalition of 4 pro-active young African minds, poised to make an impact in the next generation of African youths via every modern method possible.. Our mission is simple.. To Touch, create and inspire more young minds to be Braver than their fears, Stronger than their weaknesses and to excel far beyond their personally set limitations, because at BLUE we believe “In a life without Boundaries”
Sequel to her maiden event tagged “Love and Social Media” as held earlier in the year, BLUE is scheduled to hold her follow up event Tagged; “Battle Of The High Schools (B.O.T.Hs)” #FestacEdition at Festac Town Lagos on November the 13th 2015.

What is BOTHs?! BOTHs is an inter secondary school competition, in which 10 of the Prime Secondary schools in Festac Town (Public and Private owned) come together to participate in QUIZ, and Spelling Bee competitions on behalf of their institution, all with an aim of improving the willingness to Learn, and enthusiasm to compete all at the same time. The details are:
Theme: Battle of The High schools (BOTHs)
Date: November 13th 2015
Time: Registration starts by 9: 00 AM
Venue: St Mary’s College, 23Road besides Guarantee Trust Bank, Festac Town Lagos.

For More enquiry and partnership, please contact Omuojine Isioma: +2347038868540 and for live update, please follow us on Instgram @_blueafrica with the official hashtag for the event #BOTHs2015

Wednesday, 4 November 2015

The Advantage

We all have ideas but most times,  they do not see the light of the day. The reasons range from procrastination to lack of resources or lack of time or even lack of courage.

Sometimes, we even take that leap but find out along the line that we are unprepared and in the end, the dreams we once nurtured dies. How sad!!

The truth is it is never easy to launch an idea, trust me, it is extremely difficult and it is in the light of this that some concerned Nigerians conceptualised "The Advantage"

 It doesn't matter if you are an entrepreneur or a dreamer (no pun intended), if you are not at RCCG Beautiful gate parish, Maryland, Lagos Nigeria on the 7th of November 2015, then you are wrong. 

The Advantage is a platform focused on building capacity while providing networking opportunities for like minded individuals who are passionate about bringing their ideas into reality and in the long run, making the society a better place.  

Also, there would be networking and financial advisory opportunity at the seminar. Click here for more information and registration. 

Tuesday, 3 November 2015

Friend Zone

Once upon a time I used to think that friend zone existed in my head and not on planet earth but events have proven me otherwise.

So you see, I used to have a friend, I honestly can’t recall his name now, he works with KPMG (big boy things), we met on twitter (my bff has given up on me and my many online escapades) after a while we moved to whatsapp. When we got talking on whatsapp we practically spent the whole day talking about everything.
Along the line he was like he wasn’t ready to date, the last girl he dated fleeced him, in my mind I was like hian oga wait let me fall first before you start to feel yourself bros. somehow the calls and chats became far inbetween so one day bobo called me and accused me oh, we sha got talking on whatsapp again, he then called me one endearing name, I tackled him immediately and an argument ensued that lasted days. In the end, he was like I had zone him, I was taking his love for granted and I was like chelukwa, did you even ask me out?
I have been accused of zoning so many of my male friends although some exaggerate.

 I guess the person whose zoning is on another plane is xxx. He is on big brother zone but he has no choice because there is no where he can push me to *bats eyelashes*

Back to the matter, it seems ladies have been painted to be the main culprit of zoning but I beg to differ, the truth is at one point of our lives most of us have been zoned besides I can’t possibly agree to every proposal I get nah! It is even more annoying when the guy hasn’t said anything and along the line, I meet another guy that sweeps me off my feet and it’s at that point he speaks up like what am I supposed to do? Place you on maga zone?

One chief reason why girls zone guys is when guys act like if you don’t date them, they’ll die. Nna I hate it when a guy acts desperately! Fine, initially the attraction is usually stronger from one person but that seemingly act of desperation to be with me puts me off. Love is a verb not a noun. You actions should speak for you not like everytime you call or text, you broach the subject.

Also, wait for common grounds and physical attraction before you make the move. Else you might be placed where you don’t like oh! Don’t gan be acting like a father figure, not everybody likes it. It’s also good to figure out what the other person wants before you make your move.

Everybody knows am short and I’ve already said several times I want  a tall guy so any short guy that is thinking before you talk your answer is no before we would look like pygmies from Congo while walking down the street.

The truth is most times after blurting out your feelings, things might not be the same especially if you two were good friends before one person caught feelings, you might have to bring the close friendship down to the acquaintance level.
You might feel jealous, angry especially if immediately after zoning you, you see them dating. Yes, it’s okay but trust me, with time and a healthy attitude, you’ll be fine!!

             Rest on Temitope Lamina aka Latina. We love you, but he loves you more and may He grant your soul and the souls of other faithful departed eternal repose.